Yesterday, I posted a blog about the effects of relationships on self-esteem and mental health. I was excited to tweet it to my network, but midway through writing the tweet, I became deeply conflicted. I saw something that froze me to my core. And the thought of sharing a post not relating to what I’d seen, felt wrong.
Is it shameful to say I haven’t even brought myself to watch the full video yet? I’ve seen the pictures, I’ve read about George Floyd’s final words, “I can’t breathe”. I don’t have the language to describe the combined feelings of utter disgust, frustration, hopelessness and outrage I felt at seeing this. I don’t dare to even imagine that which must be searing through the hearts of his family.
It would feel purposeless to write this with the sole intent of venting. Neither do I want to waste time talking about those who committed this crime - too much life has been wasted on these four inhumane beasts already. And though I wish I could speak to a revolutionary transformation of the justice system, I must be honest and say it feels like a Herculean task that I have not the resources, strength or even heart for. I imagine this sentiment rings true for most people of all colours, who feel the weight of these happenings, but not the power to change them.
So rather, I write to raise awareness of the depths to which we are effected consciously and subconsciously. Affected by the innate knowledge that our bodies are perceived as battling grounds where the darkest, most beastly, hateful aspects that lie in the souls of others, can be exorcised and revelled in upon us. Our skin blinding them to the ferocity of their own blood thirst, which they mask as acts of self-defence.
And similar to me, you may have felt that wave of hopeless despair to change anything. After all, what can you do from your corner of the world which seems futile in the midst of a system, that heavily criminalises and punishes people of a particular race and social-economic background? I watched a video of Malcolm X speaking on police brutality, which was shared on Twitter. While watching it, time felt to be muddled, with no difference between past and present. What he spoke of then, eloquently described what we see now in the police brutality against unarmed men - “They attack the victim. And then the criminal who attacked the victim, accuses the victim of attacking him”.
Black criminalisation has bled into the justice system, filtering down into the invisible pockets of our daily life. We may sense it in random, unsettling events experienced when doing something as mundane as shopping. Or it might creep insidiously into interactions we have with those we consider friends and partners, where our mere way of speaking and being, if not meek enough, is construed as threatening, aggressive, provocative. Where a voice of emotion is interpreted as a trumpet of warfare. And so even if a violent deed has been enacted on them, the aggressor who committed the act can claim a free pass of victimhood and fragility.
Because the back of the one beaten - physically, verbally, spiritually or emotionally - is seen to be coloured as Stronger. Unbreakable. Inhuman.
The fact that the past Malcolm X spoke of is still our present, may cause a subtly unrelenting fear. Fear that our present is never-ending, and that it will become our children’s future. So I return to my earlier question - what can we do? Because not only do I want to raise awareness of the effects that we face, but of the actions we can take from our own individual and collective corners of the world.
Understand your rights
It’s important to know what to do and what to advise others to do, if stopped by police. StopWatch is a charity tackling the disproportionate use of stop and search, with a host of community groups, academics, campaigners and legal experts. They’re a platform for those marginalised and without a voice, where you can find absolutely everything you need to know about your rights, the alarming statistics on stop and search; policies they’re pushing for, and the places you can connect with others to share experiences.
They also provide a parent’s guide to equip youth with knowledge on how to conduct themselves during interactions with police.
Healing the day to day
Having images splashed around of racially aggravated murder in broad daylight, by authority appointed officials who wield judicial power us, can seep into your consciousness in ways we probably prefer to ignore. In the face of this, showing up and caring for each other is paramount. Not only a cathartic source of healing, but a powerful means of fortifying energy, hope and determination. There are organisations who facilitate this through therapeutic support, such as the following:
Black Thrive: A partnership between communities, voluntary, private and statutory organisations working to give black people access to improved mental health services.
BAATN: A hub of BAME counsellors and psychotherapists; as well as events and forums.
Teaching our youth
Juvenis supports young people from vulnerable and disenfranchised communities. In particular, those at risk of offending and becoming trapped in the criminal system. They engage and support youth through personal development, positive activities at key times, 1-2-1 mentoring and life skills workshops.
Empowerment through history
I believe knowing our history is fundamental to healing, because if the only narrative we’ve ever been fed is that of violence, subjugation, suffering and shame, it’s hard to develop a healthy sense of identity that's not fragmented with trauma. These two organisations are tackling this by creating transformation through re-education, and re-building of notions around black historic identity.
The Black Curriculum offers an educational Black British history curriculum. It gives children access to the depth, insight and accuracy of the full history behind black British contribution to society. Helping them to become confident, well-rounded citizens of the future.
A Tribe Called Progress provides tools to equip adults with the knowledge and skills to become capable leaders. Empowering them through discovery of a rich, precolonial history of outstanding achievements that contributed to the global advancements we know of today.
Take Action
Through advocating for your community and joining the movement for freedom, liberation and justice, you’ll also be advocating for yourselves and your loved ones. If you know this is something you want to do but don’t know where to begin, you can start by following @ukblm (Black Lives Matter UK), @Blklivesmatter and @StopWatchUK. You can also go to their respective websites to support their work, sign up for updates and access their various resources.
For more information or discussion, reach out to the organisations mentioned in this blog, or myself. Let’s carry on the conversation with the intention of healing, collaboration and change.